JUST ASK BUCKET LIST GIVEAWAY GETAWAY

This is my entry in the Just Ask Bucket List Getaway Giveaway. Just Ask offers a breast and ovarian cancer screening and is encouraging people to share 15 things that I want to enjoy in my lifetime as a reminder to be aware of my health. Want to enter? Head over to TodaysMama.com to get the details.

Some Items on my bucket list (Not in any particular order except for the first 4):
1. Live every day with no regrets
2. Bring our Daughter home from Ethiopia
3. See a cure for Cancer
4. Watch and enjoy my children grow up and succeed in whatever they choose to do in life
5. Take a cross country vacation with my husband when we are older
6. Take a cruise to Alaska
7. Visit Fiji or Tahiti and stay in a bungalow over the water
8. Completely decorate my house
9. Have our property completely landscaped
10. Celebrate my 50th wedding anniversary with my husband
11. Raise Children that have committed their lives to the Lord and know without a shadow of a doubt that they are loved!!
12. Master baking and decorating cakes and cupcakes.
13. grow a beautiful flower garden
14. Take a big family vacation (Disney, cruise, etc)
15. Renew my vows on a quiet beach

One year ago

A year ago today at this time Dad had been in the arms of Jesus for 2 hours. Our lives were forever changed and we lost the most amazing role model, grandfather, father, and friend. I will have to post about this past year at another time but one thing I have learned is that the legacy he left behind is one that allows him to still be a huge part of our lives even though he is not physically here anymore. The boys remember so much about their grandpa and still struggle with missing him, as we all do. We could not have been more blessed by having him as a part of our lives!!

What a month!

What a month of craziness!! We started the month by going to Columbus Ohio for the Equine Affaire. Luke placed 4th in his competition-missing first by only 2.5 points and competing against people that train full time for a living. He is amazing! (I am biased but seriously he's good at what he does and he loves it, now only if he could do that full time :).

Chase and Cody were quite the pair at the Equine affaire, they fell asleep during a competition and gained quite a bit of attention afterwards (picture below). They had more pictures taken of them than some of the horses there! I also came into their bedroom at the hotel the one night to find them sleeping beside eachother holding hands. They are becoming quite good friends lately and loyal to eachother!! (They do still fight with the best of them though).

We came home Sunday to deal with some stuff going on here on Monday and then Luke left Tuesday for South Dakota. He had a great trip and was able to meet the Reinhold's-an great family with a real heart for God, I can't wait to meet them someday. We had purchased 7 horses from them 4 years ago but had never actually met face to face so it was a great opportunity. Luke picked out 6 horses that will be relocating to NY in the next couple of weeks. Can't wait to see them.

Luke came home late Sunday night and we then had a family gathering for the Reinbold's on Sunday. It was a great start to the month getting to see so many friends and family!

It seems like spring wanted to come but then decided it wasn't quite ready. I really wanted to get a head start on cleaning up our yard and things from the winter months but apparently we are going to have rain and snow for a little while longer. We are all very ready to be outside in some nice weather. This week turned out to be quite the adventure....Cody was sick on Tuesday and has continued to not feel well through today (Friday) and last night Chase got sick! Guess I don't mind that it's not to nice out since we would not have been outside that much anyways.

We were able to catch up on some snuggle time though.

We also had quite the adventure with our cat, Mouse. While Luke was gone the cat had found a mouse and decided that instead of killing it he would bring it down to the living room for all of us to see. He then thought it would be fun to not kill the little thing but to just play with it. I caught it in a container and took it far away from the house to let it go. I am not a big fan of mice, I think they are kind of cute but they lose all cuteness when it comes to having one in my house.

Unfortunately that is not the end of the encounters with mice. The other morning (by morning I mean 2 a.m.) Luke wakes me up and tells me to get out of bed. The cat was acting odd he said, trying to get under our sheets, which he never does. Luke had a funny feeling that he had brought in a present for us. Me not really being totally with it just went along with Luke, we started to pull the sheets and the blankets off of the bed and all of a sudden this little mouse falls out and starts running down the hallway. Luke grabs the cat and starts running after the mouse! Seriously cat, DO NOT BRING THE MICE OUT OF THE ATTIC TO SHOW US-IF WE HAVE THEM WE DON'T NEED TO KNOW ABOUT IT-JUST KILL THEM!!!!!!! Now I know they say that pretty much everyone has mice or a mouse-I just don't tolerate it well and will do whatever possible to completely get rid of them (except I won't actually kill them-hence the letting the one go far away from the house). Needless to say next week our attic will be full of mouse traps, if there are anymore they will not be there for long!!!! I had to write this because I am certain that someday I will look back on this and laugh-someday in the very distant future!

Tonight is a night that I have to write about because I really want to remember it. Cody was very cuddly because he did not feel well and Chase decided that cuddling would be fun to, so we all climbed into the recliner to watch the end of a movie. I looked down and Chase and Cody are holding hands just as content as could be. We then proceeded to get ready for bed and Chase had to go to the bathroom, he was yelling for me to come in and wipe him -thank you Chase :)- and as I'm walking in the bathroom Cody is grabbing the toilet paper getting ready to help his brother! Chase wasn't to thrilled with the idea but Cody's little heart was in the right place. They then went to brush their teeth and Cody took both of their toothbrushes and put toothpaste on them and proceeded to hand me the dental floss. What a little helper!! I just love seeing them enjoy eachother and pray that they will grow up being the best of friends and encouragers to eachother!

When I put them to bed we continued to read the Easter story out of the Bible and I love to hear Chase talk about it. He is still trying to figure it all out and is so full of questions but I love it. Being a mom is definitely the best job ever

We had another first this month as well. Mom and Dad's anniversary was yesterday-her first anniversary without him here. We are missing him more than ever lately but he raised us well and encouraged all of us, so we know we can make it because of the lessons that he taught to us. Mom is such an amazing Godly woman and we are so blessed to have her here and to be able to walk through this journey with her. I wish it was a different journey-one with Dad still in it but all of the wishing in the world or praying won't make that possible, so we push on and take each day as it comes. They had an amazing marriage and I hope that Luke and I can learn from that and show that kind of love settin the same example for our children! I have to admit I was hoping and praying that we would get a referral on that day to give some brightness to it, but we again wait on God's timing knowing that it is perfect!

So excited, we found out that we went from number 28 on our waiting list to 18th!!! The last family given a referral waited 5.5 months and we will be waiting 5 months on the 12th-can't wait to see what happens in the next few months :)!!

Beach Party

We decided to beat the winter blues today. Waking up to snow on the ground again and more falling from the sky was not something that we were looking forward to today. The boys have been so ready for spring to get here, just the thought of being able to go outside and play is enough to make them both giddy with excitement. Unfortunately for them this winter has been very cold and very windy so they have spent little time playing outside and are missing it. Today I decided to surprise them with an indoor beach party. I moved the dining room furniture out and the "beach" in. They were both so excited, Chase insisted on wearing his life jacket the entire time.

Update Day:

Fridays are always an exciting day, we get an update from our adoption agency which includes the number of referals given. Usually we get it in the evening but I have to admit I check a couple of times during the day to see if it arrived early. With each referal given we are one step closer to our little girl! :) We are so excited today especially though because we found out that one of my closest friends has a travel date for her and her husband to fly and meet and bring home their little boy-so EXCITING!!

Growing up

I can't believe how much they've changed and how big they are getting!

Roller Coaster Ride

These last few weeks have been a roller coaster ride in bringing our little girl home. No infant referrals were being given because of a lack of HIV tests in Ethiopia and then MOWA (Ministry of Women's Affairs) announces that they were reducing their case load for adoptions down to 5 per day from 25-30 per day. A huge petition was sent around and there has been some talk that MOWA may increase their numbers again but no one is sure by how many/when/or if this will happen. Basically we'll just have to ride it out and wait! We then received word that HIV tests were now available and referrals were given out. This means we're moving up on the list!!!! It may only bring us a little closer to her but we'll take that with great joy. God's timing is perfect and while at times I want it to happen now and in my timing, that's just not an option and I have found peace in that. We think of you often little one and can't wait to know who you are and hold you but until then we will continue to keep holding onto you in our hearts and prayers. Chase is too cute, he keeps asking when she will be coming home "How long is the paperwork going to take?" he asks. When Chase and Cody see pictures of Africa Cody will say "sister" and Chase will go on to talk about that being where she will come from. I love to hear them talk about her.

Just waiting for those little handprints to finish off part of our playroom!

Chase has become quite the little talker lately (well he has been for a long time but lately he is so interested in everything and knowing how everything works). Latest question directed at Luke (thank goodness)- they were talking about our cows and how they were going to have calfs next year. Chase looks at Luke and says "Where do the calfs come from?" Luke started with the cow and bull and then went onto the word procreate. Chase then interrupted him and changed the subject. Sometimes I love that at that age they have such short attention spans, and that I can direct questions like that to Daddy :).

Cody is such a picker lately. He gets this little sheepish grin on his face and scrunches his nose and then we wait to see what's coming. It is too cute and funny (depending on what actions follow). He has no problems though fessing up to his wrong doings. Chase will come out to the kitchen crying and when we ask what happened Cody will chime in "hit him". At least he's honest.

Tonight my heart just melted watching them. Cody wanted his PaPa book to look at before bed and before I knew it they were sitting side by side and then laying side by side looking at the book talking and talking about the pictures. I really can't wait until Cody can talk a little more, just to listen to their conversations!

What a week!!

Recap of this Crazy Crazy week!

Sunday: Started off as a busy Sunday but due to the weather our plans quickly changed and we were able to stay home as a family and relax. Chase and Cody were so cute at church. They randomly just walked up to eachother and gave eachother a huge hug and just stood that way for a few minutes letting everyone walk around them in the hallway. We were all able to help Luke work on our basement project that day. Chase was quietly sitting and watching Luke, all of a sudden Luke hit his hand with his hammer and I see Chase look at him and then say "Bet that hurt." It really was priceless. I am sure he learned that from his Daddy so it was quite fitting!

They were such great little helpers that afternoon!

Monday: -I think the wind blew everyone in NY's snow right into the middle of our driveway. Luke goes to start the tractor with our snowblower on it to get the driveway cleared out-it won't start! Our downstairs toilet decided that it was going to be temperamental and not work. The car got stuck in the driveway. I had company coming that night so I thought I would go out and try to shovel some of the bad parts of our driveway (those of you that have been here are laughing right now thinking of someone attempting to shovel our driveway). I get both boys in their snow gear - we get outside and I hear Cody say that five letter word that no mother of toddlers wants to hear once your child is in full snow suite attire- "potty". I took Cody to the bathroom, made it halfway down the driveway to attempt to shovel my path and I hear Chase. "Mom I have to go potty". I then decided that shoveling was a pointless cause and am so very thankful that one of my friends drives a great suv and that the other one is so athletic (she ran down most of our driveway since her car wasn't getting in it either). :)

Tuesday: Luke got the car unstuck - unfortunately the muffler was caught in the crossfire and found itself unattached from the car! After that this was a great day, I was able to spend Tuesday with some amazing women and Chase and Cody had a blast playing in the snow making snowmen 3 or 4 times their size.

Wednesday: Where do I even start. Our toilet decided to start working on its own again-yay! Luke had heard about an auction and was going to take some machinery to it. In order to do this though he had to get the barn door open. We were experiencing some more major wind that day which always makes opening those doors difficult. It was frozen in the ground so after Luke cleared away the ice he was able to get it part of the way open, until it came off of its track. He proceeded to climb a ladder (in crazy wind) and attempt to fix it. I can't believe he was not blown over! He was able to get the door shut (so I thought). He again could not get the tractor started to clear the driveway. You'll never guess what happened next-the car got stuck. He informed me that the only vehicle that would be able to make it out was the truck. That would leave us stuck here. This would normally be no big deal but I needed to be at church that night. Again my brilliant idea-I'll try to shovel again. I was able to get the kids in a place where they were with me but out of the wind and I started working. It did not take long to realize that that idea wasn't really going to work to well. When I was walking through the deep snow I would look back and within a few minutes my tracks were completely gone! I decided to check things in the barn and noticed that the door wasn't all the way closed. The ice and wind were keeping it open so I grabbed a shovel and cleared away the ice. Still couldn't get the door closed so I called Luke-normally this isn't a big deal but with the way the wind was blowing it could have cause serious damage if it caught the door. Luke informed me that the ice was keeping it secured, I informed him there was no longer ice because I had cleared it out-oops. I was able to secure the door and arranged for my mom to pick me up and let me use her vehicle to get to church. The driveway wasn't going to cooperate and let her in with her jeep either though. I proceeded to carry both boys, with hats completely over their faces so they could see nothing, halfway down the driveway where I met my mom. We each carried one of the kids and made it to the end of the driveway to her vehicle. Like I said I really needed to be at church that night. We made it to church a little after 6:30 and around 7:00 I was informed that Chase had thrown up in his classroom. We were back at mom's by 7:15. Guess we should have just stayed home and enjoyed an evening in. The plan had been for us to drive home with Luke on his way back from work but we decided that with it raining and sleeting it would be best to leave the boys at moms since they were sound asleep. While mom and I were putting Chase to sleep he got sick again! I asked him if he wanted some water and then saw Cody leave the room. I heard all this noise in the bathroom and then in walks Cody with a dixie cup of water for Chase. It was so sweet. He then gave him a stuffed animal and a hug along with 2 more glasses of water. Cody usually sleeps in grandma's room since Chase has claimed the guest room has HIS. That night we thought it best for them both to sleep in "Chase's room". Chase wasn't that thrilled but once they fell asleep they were so cute-there little hands were touching everytime we checked on them. The next morning I found out that Cody had gotten sick all over their bed (bet grandma was glad they were in the other bed), so both boys got to sleep in Grandma's room. I went home with Luke to help get chores done and when we walked into the barn the cows were loose in the barn. They had broken a gate, at least there was nothing for them to get into. We just had to laugh ...when it rains it poors.

Thursday: I picked the boys up early and we made a very quick trip to town, they both seemed to be feeling much better. It was a very quick bug with very few symptoms with it thankfully! Luke was able to get the car unstuck and it stayed in one piece. He also did some work on the tractor and it started so he was able to clear out our driveway. He got his barn door all the way open and was able to make some progress on the basement project with the help of a family friend. Cody and Chase were quiet today but still playing and having a good morning. Lately Cody has decided that he enjoys being naked much better than having clothes on at times. He will randomly take off his pants (I should mention he is potty trained) and underwear, can't usually get his shirt off though. What is it about this age that they like to be naked so much! He managed to get part of the way down the stairs to the basement to 'help' daddy, I hadn't yet realized he had left his clothes upstairs. Luke was at the bottom of the stairs and called my name in a somewhat distressed voice. He informed me that Cody had had an accident. I quickly grabbed him and took him into the bathroom. At this time Chase announced in a disgusted voice that Cody had pooped on the carpet. As I'm reaching for a washcloth I see Cody reach behind him, pull off a piece of what was stuck to his bare bottom and attempt to put it in his mouth. I quickly yelled no, totally disgusted and surprised by what he was about to do. Cody looked at me just as surprised and then I had one of those 'ah-ha' moments that we as mothers have sometimes. I remembered that I had made chocolate chip cookies that morning and Cody and Chase had both had some of the chocolate chips. Cody had managed to sit on a couple of them and melt them onto the carpet and onto his bottom!! The moment was priceless once this all dawned on me and I shared it with Luke and informed Chase! The experiences of being a mom can be so amusing at times! Did I mention that I spent almost 30 minutes on this blogpost and then hit a button and deleted it all.......lol, what can you do but laugh!

This has been one of my favorite weeks-not one I want to relive all the time but we have some fun memories from it!!

ADOPTION NEWS: It has been a disappointing week in someways because we found out that MOWA is attempting to go from processing 25 adoption cases in Ethiopia a day to 5! That means a major slow down in getting our little girl home once we have a referral and court. On a positive note though they are working to try to get them to reconsider and there is no longer a shortage of HIV tests in Ethiopia so referrals for children under 18 months can start being given once the children are tested!! Everything in God's timing we keep reminding ourselves. I just can't wait to meet her though!!

A Few Hours Alone

The other day I was given the opportunity to do something I have not done in years. The boys went to my mom's and Luke had to work. I had the house all to myself-what to do? (I have to admit I was sad as they were pulling out of the driveway-I missed them already) The thought of doing nothing seemed very enjoyable and relaxing, but instead I decided to listen to some music and finish painting our entryway (fun right :). I heard a new song that had come out that described how life has been here in the past year or so. The song is Blessings - Laura Story. I won't write out all of it but here is most of it:

'We pray for blessings

We pray for peace

Comfort for family, protection while we sleep

We pray for your mighty hand to ease our suffering

All the while, you hear each spoken need

Yet love is way to much to give us lesser things

cause what if your blessings come through raindrops

what if your healing comes through tears

what if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near

what if trials of this life are your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom

your voice to hear

we cry in anger when we cannot feel you near

we doubt your goodness

we doubt your love

as if every promise from your word is not enough

all the while you hear each desperate plea

as long as we have faith to believe

When friends betray us

When darkness seems to win

We know that pain reminds this heart

that this is not our home

What if the greatest dissapointments

or the aching of this life

is a revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy

what if trials of this life

the rain, the storms, the hardest nights

are your mercies in disguise'

(ok so maybe I wrote the whole song)

So I did something I have yet had the chance to do alone-I grieved the loss of my dad. I realized for the first time that I need to do that, I need to have more time to myself to just be able to process. After Dad passed for the sake of the boys and ourselves we pressed on. With a constant ache in our hearts we kept living and while I know we needed to do that and we still do, we need time to grieve. What that is supposed to look like I am not sure but I think I have started to find out. I painted those walls with tears streaming down my face. Getting our house finished would seem like something to be very excited for and we are but it is one major thing that Dad would have loved to see. So while I can't wait for it to be done, sometimes I would like to shut the door and never look down there-pretending that it was the same as it was last year at this time. Everyone else's life goes back to normal it seems like, which needs to happen, but for us every new thing whether good or bad is a new thing that we are not experiencing with him by our side. Not only the new things but also the things that we have always done-he is not there doing them with us anymore.

There have been times where I have been angry with God, heartbroken, and hurt...everything this song states but the reality is His love is enough to take our anger and our hurt and to hold us through it, to lift us up even when we don't understand.

After that song came on, another one followed that hit home...Come to Jesus by Point of Grace, and so the tears continued... There comes a point for all of us where we can't do it on our own anymore and we need to be reminded of that everyonce in awhile. We all get tired and weak whether it be from some major life changing event or just from daily living. I think we have all questioned God at one time or another. I can honestly say that I definitely have at times questioned him.. As the song says "we all lose faith and lean on mercy"-there is no place I would rather be leaning during that time than on God's mercy.

"We all fall down, we all need saving.

Once in awhile you are not alone

we all lose faith and lean on mercy

through our darkest night

He said he'd wait for us

Just come to Jesus"

It might seem odd that I am writing about all of this but these are lessons and memories that I don't want to forget. I don't ever want to forget the emotions of how important my Dad was to me/or any of us. I hate to see my boys, especially Cody who really just doesn't understand, hurting or crying because Grandpa/Papa isn't here and because they miss him. To hear Cody saying "Papa...die...sad": and then cry is awful-but his papa meant something to him and we want him to always remember that. I don't ever want them to forget what he meant to them. I don't say that meaning I want them crying and aching over missing him-while we will always miss Dad, in time we will have the memories without so much of the pain. The boys both know that He is in Heaven and will tell people that, someday the significance of that will mean something to them!! Dad's healing came through our tears, but he is healed and is no longer in pain and for that we are blessed!!!

On a lighter note :) - here are some pics of the munchkins. I am very biased but they are so stinking cute!!!!

This is their new kitty, Mouse.

If only they were that nice to eachother all the time :), we'll just pretend!

ADOPTION NEWS:

Ok While that title made it look exciting we are still just waiting and praying. We talked to our agency the other day and increased our age from birth to 14 months (it was 12 months). We did this because we aren't set on adopting a small infant, but she has to be at least a year younger than Cody. Right now there is a shortage of HIV Tests in Ethiopia so they aren't giving out many if any referrals for babies under 18 months. In His timing!! (easier said than felt I have to admit).

Birthday Wishes and Valentines Kisses

The middle of February is a busy time in our home, we have Chase's Birthday on February 12, mine on the 13th and then Valentine's day on the 14th. Most of our attention goes towards Chase's birthday. I have looked at him lately and can not believe what a young man he is becoming. He is no longer my little baby and hasn't been for some time but he will always be our very special first born. I was recently thinking back to the day he was born-backing up a little- The week before we had gone to the doctor's and she had set up and induction date. She had explained that because of his size she didn't want to wait much longer. We arrived at the hospital early that morning not certain of what to expect. We decided we (and by this we at this point I mean me) would try to go as long as we could without an epidural. I spent the day walking the halls with Luke and laying in bed on the monitors. It was a great day with just the 2 of us. The last few hours as a family of 2 was spent with great anticipation for the arrival of our baby. I was not in any real pain so things were quite relaxed.........until she broke my water, that all ended and I wanted an epidural NOW!! I don't really understand why these anesthesiologists can't be ready to just give out the drugs immediately, but instead he had to read my chart (which you would have thought was hundreds of pages long) and then talk to me a little. At that point I wasn't to concerned about the side effects or possibilities-the only possibility that I put much thought into was to the fact that some of my pain could possibly be gone if he would just inject me! He really was great at what he did which I was so thankful for. Once I had the epidural I felt so much better until our little Chase decided to fracture or chip (we're not sure which) my tailbone. Just in case you didn't know, epidurals don't work for that part of your body!! It was approaching 11:30 pm and my doctor began discussing the possibility of a C-section, Chase had been stuck and wasn't moving much-I had been in hard labor-pushing, etc for at least 2 hours and was in a great deal of pain with my tailbone. Thankfully though at 11:58pm he was born. 2 Minutes before my birthday-what a great early bday present. The nurse immediately took him and all I could remember hearing was her saying "just breathe little man, just breathe". My heart was racing wondering what was happening, the nurse looked at me and said "he'll be ok" and then turned back to him and kept telling him to breathe. Luke said he has never seen anyone so blue....Chase did start breathing soon after that on his own and so did Luke and I. It was an amazing feeling watching Luke stand over his little boy just looking at him, touching his hand. That image will forever be near to my heart. they then brought him over to me and I will never forget what I said. He had a little cap on and I looked at him as I was taking him and asked the nurse "is that whole thing his head" -sorry buddy! He had a cone head and within a week lost almost an inch of his height. He was still so perfect! Later that night (around 1:30a.m.) my parents arrived and we handed Chase to them and when my Dad took him and was looking at him we told them his whole name- "Chase Jeffrey Reinbold" my Dad looked like he was going to tear up a little. This little bundle was named after him and it was one of the greatest surprises we have ever shared with my parents. His name holds a legacy within it! The next day we had a number of Luke's family visit, more of mine, and some friends. We loved introducing Chase to everyone! We love him more than we ever knew we could love and have been so blessed as we watch him grow up. He is an amazing son and a great big brother. Again we are so blessed to have 2 of the most precious children!!

He is just growing so quickly!!

Onto Valentine's Day!

We started the week off by sending out home-made Valentine's to some of our family. The boys had a good time making them and I love to watch them and listen to them when they are busy working. This Valentine's Day itself was kind of a blur, I had to run to Rochester and Luke worked until 11pm.

I gave my Mom pink roses, I admire her so much for the amazing Godly woman that she is! Her and Dad seemed like they celebrated Valentine's Day every day of the year. I loved watching how they were truly madly in love with eachother and best friends! Mom spent the evening with us which was great.

Once the kids were in bed I started working on my plan to spoil Luke for the night, I have to admit that as a wife I am extremely spoiled. I don't necessarily mean with monetary things but spoiled none the less. I rarely ever have to go get into a cold car if Luke is home, he loves and adores me and our kids! I can not think of a single time he has ever told me no when I wanted something. I could go on for hours about how amazing he is!!

I had recently found out that his favorite pie was Pecan Pie. Yes we have been married this long and I always thought it was apple!! I made it that morning and hid it (well I thought I hid it but of course he found it which I found out later). I have so much fun baking and trying to be creative-trying is the key word there. I had it all planned for when he got home- I had a nice warm bath ready for him with some yummy snacks, including my favorite beverage- Concord grape sparkling juice. I know I'm odd but I love that stuff!! I took some of the best advice I was ever given from my Dad...I married my best friend! I love going through everyday with him-the bad and the good!!

Life is a picture-paint it well........

For whatever reason while I was lying in bed snuggling Cody, I was thinking about my Dad. Not an uncommon topic of thought by any means, but this thought stream just hit me and made me think of how this statement applied to his life....
Life is a picture, paint it well..... He didn't paint a picture though, he was involved in a masterpiece. He did something so few of us do. He allowed God to sketch it and then he pursued painting it. When God created this sketch He did not reveal it all at once, Dad had to rely on His guidance to perfect this masterpiece that we all know as his life. It wasn't created with perfect lines or in bland color. God made it unique and colorful, through all of the blessings received and challenges overcome-turning every action/stroke into a meaningful attribute of the overall masterpiece.
The thing about masterpieces is that they gain worth over time. To us his masterpiece is priceless but will only remain that way if we pursue looking at it and remembering it, sharing it. The Legacy of his life is the masterpiece that he left behind, in all of the lessons taught, memories made, tears, and the laughter.
Another unique thing about masterpieces is that every artist has similarities and uniquenesses that signify their work. God is the same- we need to allow God to add or lives as masterpieces to His collection.

How much more meaningful would our lives be if we truly allowed Him to guide our every step!

The beginning....

This is not actually the beginning of things with our family but this is where this new chapter of our lives begins. This post is going to be catch-up and then I am going to use this blog to document our adventures, trials, challenges. I don't want to forget a second of my beautiful families life!!
This part of our journey begins in October/November 2009. We felt God pulling on our hearts and had to make a decision, to follow His calling and trust in Him or to be like Jonah and try to slip away from it hoping that God did not pursue the matter. We chose to trust and obey. God had called us to expand our family through adoption. We knew he was calling us to Ethiopia and while we were excited we had our hesitations. Not because of our beautiful little girl-we could not wait to meet her, but because of all the legal and financial logistics. We decided and applied to an agency and God closed that door-thankfully. We then went to Children's Hope International and have been so blessed by this journey with them. This was not the end of the challenges. In December my Dad, Grandpa/Papa Haenisch was not feeling well. On December 24, 2009 he was diagnosed with stage IV Pancreatic cancer. He made the decision to fight it and we had one of the best years ever. He was so excited about our baby girl and how God was working in our lives. He was our number one supporter and fan/ him and mom. He committed his life to Christ a long time ago and lived his final months in a way that would continue to glorify God! He was one of those men that didn't just live life to live it, he lived life and when he went home to the Lord he left a legacy behind him! A legacy that we will continually share with our children. The have so many great memories with him and so many pictures of all the things he did with them-thankfully. He always had time for them and made away to include them in whatever he was doing, willingly teaching them lessons as they worked and played. He longed to meet our baby girl and I know he shed tears over not getting the chance. That is where the title of this blog came from-from him. When we knew he was getting worse I asked for something that I could keep with me all the time. He picked out a ring for Mom, Jaime, Grandma, and myself. He then chose what words he wanted on them. My ring has our names and mine says TIFFANY & DAD, ONE IN HEART. With 2 interlocking hearts with his birthstone in one and mine in the other. This thought has helped get me through so many different times since we lost him on September 28, 2010. This was the worst day of my life to this point and yet this amazing man really isn't fully gone because of the way he allowed God to use him to touch so many-because of the Legacy that he left. When I have regrets or struggles where Dady is concerned I can look back knowing that I knew him well enough to know exactly what he would have said or done. I am so blessed that he had such an amazing and close relationship with the boys and pray that God blesses them with vivid memories of him. Chase took it very hard immediately. He knew grandpa was sick and when we tried to talk about it with him he would totally avoid the subject and then make little comments like "some kids don't like it when their grandpa's are hurting" and then he would move on to something else. The look of hurt and pain in his eyes when we told him is something I will never forget. He immediately started sobbing and continued for quite sometime-he was 3 and we were not prepared for this. We were almost prepared for anything but this actually, Grandpa really was his best friend. Cody did not really respond immediately, after all he wasn't even 2 yet. We have since learned that even though he was so little his Papa was his world. He used to sit at the window when he would see him outside and cry until Papa came into see him! He has since surprised us saying such things as "Papa Out"- referring to wanting Papa to come out of the CD player when they are listening to his recorded stories. "Papa Hold me", "Papa...How....Die", We have since been challenged with reminding both boys that their Grandpa/Papa did not choose to leave them, which I think they know but will really understand someday. They do know he loved them and we will always remind them of that and I can not wait to tell our beautiful little girl all about her Papa and how much he loved her! Most likely it does not work this way but I am OK with thinking in my heart that he will get to see her from Heaven before we ever meet her, maybe even help choose her for us. Ok like I said, I know it probably doesn't work that way but ........it's a very comforting thought-as is the fact that we serve a gracious, merciful, and loving God who is always there!
Some of my favorite memories of this past year come from just watching the boys growing up, watching Luke expanding his equine business and the ways mom and dad blessed us by just being a very active part of our lives. Amazing Godly examples of husband and wife, parents, grandparents, along with the example Dad set as a businessman. Not just speaking but really living that way, allowing God to guide every decision and giving Him the glory even through the cancer!
Onto our baby girl, again I come back to the One In Heart.......she is in my heart and I long to have her in my arms. For awhile I was consumed of thoughts of her. Not a bad thing I might add. I love to pray for her and think of her, longing to hold her and to have her here where I can protect her and nurture her. God has and is continuing to work on my heart, His timing is perfect and she is His child. Whether here in our home or still in Ethiopia-she is HIS!! As are our boys! I am not always a fan of this lesson because I want to have them all, including the rest of my family in little bubbles where they can never be hurt (I typed this and then heard a crash and Cody crying...)-ok he is alright. God wants what is best for all of us and most importantly wants us to allow ourselves to be used to further His kingdom. After all-this is our temporary home!
This entry has jumped all over the place and I am sure there will be more like it but it is a starting point to our story!